Tag: Marriage

  • Gay Marriage,Don’t Fault the Catholic Church.

    Is the author saying that the Gay Marriage is to be sanctified by the Church?

    He does not seem o believe in The Old Testament.

    Stained glass at St John the Baptist's Anglica...
    Stained glass at St John the Baptist’s Anglican Church http://www.stjohnsashfield.org.au, Ashfield, New South Wales. Illustrates Jesus’ description of himself “I am the Good Shepherd” (from the Gospel of John, chapter 10, verse 11). This version of the image shows the detail of his face. The memorial window is also captioned: “To the Glory of God and in Loving Memory of William Wright. Died 6th November, 1932. Aged 70 Yrs.” (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

    If  The Old Testament is to be  questioned, The New Testament has no place , as The Old Testament is Primary.

    The question of a Religion sanctifying Gay marriage does not arise.

    None of the World Religions approve of  Gay Relationship.

    Gay relationship is not normal human behavior.

    There is evidence that animals, like Chimpanzees engage themselves in Homosexual activity.

    But to quote this o justify Human Gay activity as normal is incorrect.

    If we were to accept this logic, we are none he better than the animals.

    Religion, apart from ennobling the soul, is an instrument of Social Order.

    Some behaviors in the Society are harmful to the Structure of society.

    Therefore Society has called them  Taboos.

    People can also justify incest, by quoting Oedipus!

    How absurd!

    If Gay and Lesbian marriages are to be given Religious sanction, these behaviours, which are not normal, become rampant.

    In a Society, an order has to be maintained.

    (For further reading please read my blog on ‘Gay Marriages Legalised’

    Human instinct if followed unchecked by Reason, will create problems at some stage for those who indulge in it and  destabilize the Society in the long run.

    Gays and Lesbians must realise that they have a problem and learn to live with it.

    You can not force others to approve of it.

    It is their prerogative.

    Note: The Church itself is not beyond reproach, we have Gay priests, Lesbian Nuns and Paedophiles among them.

    It is not to be taken as an example, but rather as a warning.

    If one were to question the Origin of The Bible, the entire Bible can be discarded as the Bible was compiled by Constantine nearly 300 years after the Death of Jesus Christ.

    Faith is something one should accept with heart,.

    We know we can not control the Future and Death, this is Logic.

    Do we accept it whole-heartedly ?

    “Why do some people who would recognize gay civil unions oppose gay marriage? Certain religious groups want to deny gays the sacredeness of what they take to be a sacrament. But marriage is no sacrament.

    Some of my fellow Catholics even think that “true marriage” was instituted by Christ. It wasn’t. Marriage is prescribed in Eden by YHWH (Yahweh) at Genesis 2.24: man and wife shall “become one flesh.” When Jesus is asked about marriage, he simply quotes that passage from Genesis (Mark 10.8). He nowhere claims to be laying a new foundation for a “Christian marriage” to replace the Yahwist institution.

    Some try to make the wedding at Cana (John 1.1-11) somehow sacramental because Jesus worked his first miracle there. But that was clearly a Jewish wedding, like any other Jesus might have attended, and the miracle, by its superabundance of wine, is meant to show the disciples that the Messianic time has come. The great Johannine scholar Father Raymond Brown emphasizes this, and concludes of the passage: “Neither the external nor the internal evidence for a symbolic reference to matrimony is strong. The wedding is only the backdrop and occasion for the story, and the joining of the man and woman does not have any direct role in the narrative.”

    The early church had no specific rite for marriage. This was left up to the secular authorities of the Roman Empire, since marriage is a legal concern for the legitimacy of heirs. When the Empire became Christian under Constantine, Christian emperors continued the imperial control of marriage, as the Code of Justinian makes clear. When the Empire faltered in the West, church courts took up the role of legal adjudicator of valid marriages. But there was still no special religious meaning to the institution. As the best scholar of sacramental history, Joseph Martos, puts it: “Before the eleventh century there was no such thing as a Christian wedding ceremony in the Latin church, and throughout the Middle Ages there was no single church ritual for solemnizing marriage between Christians.”

    Only in the twelfth century was a claim made for some supernatural favor (grace) bestowed on marriage as a sacrament. By the next century marriage had been added to the biblically sacred number of seven sacraments. Since Thomas Aquinas argued that the spouses’ consent is the efficient cause of marriage and the seal of intercourse was the final cause, it is hard to see what a priest’s blessing could add to the reality of the bond. And bad effects followed. This sacralizing of the natural reality led to a demoting of Yahwist marriage, the only kind Jesus recognized, as inferior to “true marriage” in a church.

    In the 1930s, my parents had a civil marriage, but my Catholic mother did not think she was truly married if not by a priest. My non-Catholic father went along with a church wedding (but in the sacristy, not the sanctuary) by promising to raise his children as Catholic. My mother thought she had received the sacrament, but had she? Since mutual consent is the essence of marriage, one would think that the sacrament would have to be bestowed on both partners; but my non-Catholic father could not receive the sacrament. Later, when my father left and married another, my mother was told she could not remarry because she was still married to my father in the “true marriage.” When he returned to my mother, and became a Catholic, a priest performed again the sacramental marriage. Since my father’s intervening marriage was “outside the church,” it did not count. What nonsense.

    Those who do not want to let gay partners have the sacredness of sacramental marriage are relying on a Scholastic fiction of the thirteenth century to play with people’s lives, as the church has done ever since the time of Aquinas. The myth of the sacrament should not let people deprive gays of the right to natural marriage, whether blessed by Yahweh or not. They surely do not need—since no one does—the blessing of Saint Thomas.”

    Garry Wills

    http://www.nybooks.com/blogs/nyrblog/2012/may/09/marriage-myth/

    Some quoes from The Bible on Marriage.

    Genesis 2:23-24 The man said,
    “This is now bone of my bones,
    And flesh of my flesh;
    She shall be called Woman,
    Because she was taken out of Man,”
    For this reason a man shall leave his father and his mother,
    and be joined to his wife; and they shall become one flesh.

    Genesis 3:16 To the woman he said,
    “I will greatly increase your pains in childbearing;
    with pain you will give birth to children.
    Your desire will be for your husband,
    and he will rule over you.”

    1 Corinthians 13:1-13 If I speak in the tongues of men and of angels,
    but have not love, I am only a resounding gong or a clanging cymbal.
    If I have the gift of prophecy and can fathom all mysteries and all knowledge,
    and if I have a faith that can move mountains,
    but have not love, I am nothing.
    If I give all I possess to the poor and surrender my body to the flames,
    but have not love, I gain nothing.
    Love is patient,
    love is kind.
    It does not envy,
    it does not boast,
    it is not proud.
    It is not rude,
    it is not self-seeking,
    it is not easily angered,
    it keeps no record of wrongs.
    Love does not delight in evil
    but rejoices with the truth.
    It always protects,
    always trusts,
    always hopes,
    always perseveres.
    Love never fails.
    But where there are prophecies,
    they will cease;
    where there are tongues,
    they will be stilled;
    where there is knowledge,
    it will pass away.
    For we know in part and we prophesy in part,
    but when perfection comes, the imperfect disappears.
    When I was a child, I talked like a child,
    I thought like a child, I reasoned like a child.
    When I became a man, I put childish ways behind me.
    Now we see but a poor reflection as in a mirror;
    then we shall see face to face. Now I know in part; then I shall know fully,
    even as I am fully known.
    And now these three remain: faith, hope and love.
    But the greatest of these is love.

    1 Corinthians 7:3 The husband should fulfill his marital duty to his wife, and likewise the wife to her husband.

    http://chapel.thefairkingdom.com/biblemarriage.html#genesis

  • 99 Year Old Divorces Wife for Affair in 1940. Right

    On the face of it, the decision to divorce the wife may sound unsound and silly.

    The man who has a Great Grand child would definitely have thought about his as well.

    If he has to decide to go in for Divorce at this age with the prospect of being laughed at,he must have had a strong reason.

    I surmise that it is a feeling of having been betrayed by the one with whom he has been together for so long.

    I think he is Right.

    “The Italian man, identified by lawyers in the case only as Antonio C, was rifling through an old chest of drawers when he made the discovery a few days before Christmas.

    Notwithstanding the time that had elapsed since the betrayal, he was so upset that he immediately confronted his wife of 77 years, named as Rosa C, and demanded a divorce.

    Guilt-stricken, she reportedly confessed everything but was unable to persuade her husband to reconsider his decision.

    She wrote the letters to her lover during a secret affair in the 1940s, according to court papers released in Rome this week.

    The couple are now preparing to split, despite the ties they forged over nearly eight decades – they have five children, a dozen grandchildren and one great-grand child.

    The discovery of the letters was the final straw for a marriage which had already run into difficulty – 10 years ago the husband briefly left their house in Rome and moved in with one of his sons, only to return a few weeks later.

    The Italian press attributed the acrimonious split to the couple’s southern blood – he is originally from Olbia in Sardinia, while his wife was born in Naples.

    The couple met during the 1930s when Antonio was posted as a young Carabinieri officer to Naples.

    The case appears to set a new record, at least for the age of the oldest protagonist – the previous oldest couple to divorce were Bertie and Jessie Wood, both aged 98, from the UK.

    The pair ended their 36-year marriage in 2009 when they were both two years away from their 100th birthdays.

    They got married in Elstree, Hertfordshire, in 1972, having both ended previous marriages, before moving to Falmouth, Cornwall four years later.

    http://www.telegraph.co.uk/news/newstopics/howaboutthat/8982958/99-year-old-divorces-wife-after-he-discovered-1940s-affair.html

  • Marriage, Blind Union or A Sacred Duty?

    I read an interesting blog on marriage and  I am reproducing a portion of it, the Link with my comment.

    My comment.

    Saptapadi Ritual
    Just married going around the Fire

    Truly said.
    Matrimony is not about sex alone, though it forms an integral part.
    More than physical proximity it is that ‘I have some one to lean on,and another leans on me’ is an emotional requirement of an individual.

    Marriage is also a spiritual bond.
    Hinduism states that marriage is so holy that because of the entire world is sustained,
    It is the responsible married man who forms the nucleus of a Society, by taking care of others;as a corollary others take care of you.
    No Religious ceremony will bear fruit if not performed along with the wife.
    For a Man,none of the Religious duties will bear fruit..
    It is a Union that supports one another in their fulfilment of earthly desires and the takes care of the World beyond..
    In the performance of marriage,in Hindu custom,just married pair walk around the sacred Fire together, with these 7 vows.
    ‘During this ritual, the groom walks with the bride to the right side of the sacred fire. All along, he holds his wife’s right hand in his right hand in the way in which he held her hand during the paani grahanam ceremony. He stops, bends down and holds the right toe of his wife with his right hand and helps her take seven steps around the fire. At the beginning of each step, he recites a Veda mantra to invoke the blessings of Maha Vishnu. Through these seven mantras, he asks Maha Vishnu to follow in the footsteps of his wife and bless her with food, strength, piety, progeny, wealth, comfort and health. At the conclusion of the seven steps, he addresses his wife with a moving statement from the Veds summarized below: Dear Wife! By taking these seven steps, you have become my dearest friend. I pledge my unfailing loyalty to you. Let us stay together for the rest of our lives. Let us not separate from each other ever. Let us be of one mind in carrying out our responsibilities as householders (grihasthas). Let us love and cherish each other and enjoy nourishing food and good health. Let us discharge our prescribed Vedic duties to our elders, ancestors, rishis, creatures, and gods. Let our aspirations be united. I will be the Saaman and may you be the Rk (Saaman here refers to the music and Rk refers to the Vedic text that is being cast into music). Let me be the upper world and let you be the Bhumi or Mother Earth. I will be the Sukla or life force and may you be the bearer of that Sukla. Let me be the mind and let you be the speech. May you follow me to conceive children and gain worldly as well as spiritual wealth. May all auspiciousness come your way. This series of Veda mantras starting with “sakhaa saptapadhaa bhava …” and ending with “pumse putraaya …” are rich with meaning and imagery.’

    http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Viv%C4%81ha#Sapta_Padi

    A man/woman’s Life is incomplete without Matrimony.
    Sad that such a sacred institution has come to the stage of being called a ‘Contract‘ as if it is a business deal.

    The Blog.

    It is interesting to look at marriage, both in the contemporary and historical frame. The act of marriage today in many countries is a legal arrangement, or a contract binding two by law. This, to me, dilutes the sacred nature of the promise; the vows exchanged and the love that two people share. We should travel the sphere of sacred union to learn what lives within the heart.

    Throughout history and within many different cultures, marriage has changed. We can see many peculiarities and attributes of what constitutes marriage when we study these customs. A binding of two is a sacred thing, marked by ceremony, rings, paintings, clothing and many other symbols of unity…..

    As we travel within the sphere of sacred union, we must realize that a marriage at its purest form is a promise; a sacred vow of love. It seems that so many have forgotten this in the world. Divorce is becoming more a common occurrence than the entry into matrimony. By making marriage a legal document; a common contract of law, we have made the sacred vow mute.

    I’ve been married. It did not last. I’ve known many friends who married, and soon after divorced. I also know many who have been together for more than a decade, without being married. They choose to stay beyond the contract, and only live with love for each other. Though yes, they do have struggles, but this is part of life. Many are capable of keeping the sacred promise to each other, but of course, many others cannot.

    http://knowthesphere.wordpress.com/2012/04/10/blind-union-3/#comment-2164

  • Woman who Only sleeps with Married Men

    I posted a blog some time back ‘Man who slept with 1000 women and woman who slept with 1000 men.

    Now this piece takes the cake, of a woman accountant,33,who only sleeps with married men( I have been careful in placing the adjective)

    Look at her profession as a marriage counsellor!

    This might help some to ease their conscience!

    Story:

    Dee Jones who slept only slept with married men.
    Dee Jones who slept only with married men.

    For the past three months, the 33-year-old accountant has been dating attached men — and has no plans to change her ways.

    Feeling no guilt, she is unrepentant when it comes to her playgirl lifestyle filled with gifts, lavish meals and no-strings sex.

    Here Dee, from Harrow, North London, reveals why she thinks the wives of the married men she dates should be THANKING her rather than feeling angry with her.

    Dee says: “There is nothing wrong with what I do. The way I see it, I’m helping the women because the men go home happier. I provide an emotional outlet for men bored by their wives.”

    In fact, she jokingly refers to herself as “an alternative marriage counsellor“.

    She continues: “As well as satisfying them, I also give the men advice on their failing personal lives. I love the excitement of doing something I shouldn’t.

    “And, what’s even better is I can hand them back to their wives when I’m done.”

    A “feisty” woman who has never had a problem getting a date, Dee first went out with a taken man about four years ago.

    She recalls: “I enjoyed my time with him and, although it came to an end, it didn’t put me off.

    “I loved the fact I could be with him when it suited me and I didn’t have to be exclusively with him.”

    Finding herself single again in January after a long-term relationship, Dee decided she was going to hunt down more married men to get some excitement back in her life.

    She says: “I just wanted some fun — so I typed ‘meet a married man’ into an internet search engine.”

    Within minutes, Dee had created an online profile on the website Illicit Encounters and was receiving loads of requests for dates.

    She says: “It is so flattering and exciting. I love knowing that all these men want is to take me out and ravish me.”

    With no baggage, no strings and no emotional involvement, Dee could have her cake and eat it — at the expense of somebody else.

    Shockingly, these types of websites actually facilitate affairs for people who are unhappy in their sex-less relationships but have no intention of leaving their partner.

    Career girl Dee is currently seeing three married men “on rotation”.

    She explains: “Once a fortnight, the men will take me out to posh restaurants or for drinks in swanky bars — I even cook dinner for one of them at my house.”

    Amazingly, Dee doesn’t feel any guilt.

    http://www.whatsonjinan.com/news-2009-i-only-sleep-with-married-men-says-33-yr-old-uk-accountant-dee-jones.html

  • Senior Live-in Relationship, Prostitution in another Garb

    The Live-in Mela for Senior citizens was conducted in Ahmedabad,India in 2010 and the response was so huge that people had to be sent back from the Hall!

    Four months later,out of 200 people who had decided to Live-in, only two were found to be together!

    In one case, the man had to enter into an agreement that he will pay the woman Rs.8000/month.

    In yet another case,  a man travelled  with a woman once and the woman went out.

    He left her saying she was fat.

    Seniors of this kind can not be called seniors,excepting by Age,must know that if they can not live with whom he /she has lived for years together, they can not hope to live with a stranger whom they had met for a few hours and who have the same problems.

    Relation ship consists in adjusting with one another and it does not grow if one were to look for beauty and perfection in the partner.

    Those who have lost their spouse must realize,at least in the autumn of their Life, that we are born alone and shall go alone.

    One has to accept that.

    The alternative is that one has to shoulder the responsibility that comes in with a relationship.

    You can not remain irresponsible.

    What do these people expect?

    Money,emotional security,servant maid,sex?

    Sad aspect is that women, even at this age, are more focussed on money!

    Live-in for Seniors, seems to m a garb for prostitution.

    Younger generation seems to like this concept.

    They shall know that it does not lead to emotional security, probably could give them sex with out Familial commitment.

    PS. Another mela for senior citizens was at Nagpur on on Jan 2012 .

     

    “Live-in is in with the seniors, but only as an aspiration! The live-in mela for senior citizens that was held in Ahmedabad on November 20, 2011 had created a lot of buzz with nearly 400 grandpas and grandmas looking for a partner in the dusk of their lives. Over 400 silvers – 300 men and 100 women over 50 year of agehad descended upon the city from all over the country to take part in the first-ever public function held to help seniors find live in partners. Nearly 200 men had to be turned away from the venue as the hall was choc-a-bloc and there was no further room. Seven couples committed on the spot.

    Four-odd months later, only two of the couples have actually started living together. Ironically, after finding each other on a public platform, both want to remain anonymous. The couples cite social reasons not to disclose the fact that there are staying together without getting into the complications of marriage!

    A 55-year old woman and 62-year old Patel man have started staying together in Himmatnagar. They entered into a pre-live-in agreement where the woman would get a monthly cheque of Rs 8,000. Meanwhile, a 48-year old Punjabi woman has signed live-in agreement with 65-year old Vadodara based man.

    “The rest backed out for different reasons. One gentleman went out with the lady to watch movies, eat and later when she dropped him at the airport, he called me saying the woman was fat.”

    http://timesofindia.indiatimes.com/city/ahmedabad/age/old-problems-scuttle-seniors-live/in-dreams/articleshow/12497358.cms